My Pettiest Pet Peeves

In no particular order.

So I saw this article on Man Repeller last week and not only did it ignite a fire in my petty, petty soul, but it inspired me to come up with my own list of pet peeves – because I have quite a few of them. I’m not proud of these, and I recognize that some of them may just be downright mean-spirited and unreasonable, but that doesn’t stop these grievances from irking me to my very core. You don’t have to agree with me, but tell me if you do – nothing unites people like shared hatred! And if you read this and realize that you do any of these things… check yourself.

1. People who walk with their hands waving

Why I’m peeved: I’m not even sure how to describe this properly, but I’m sure you know what I mean. Those people who walk with their arms hanging and waving back and forth like pendulums. These people walk like they’re trying to do the floss dance. Do they think that waving their arms like that is making them walk faster? Are they aware that their arms aren’t wings? I have been hit by these flailing arms too many times.

Why I’m petty: These people probably don’t even realize that they’re doing this. To be fair, 95% of the time I get hit by a waving arm, the person the arm is attached to apologizes for hitting me.

2. Shoppers who leave their used coffee cups and napkins around a store

Why I’m peeved: Seriously, who raised you? First of all, there are SO MANY garbage cans and recycling bins around malls and busy shopping streets. I’m sure you could even walk up to the cash register and ask them to throw it out for you. You’re really going to just leave it there? Nasty. It’s just nasty! Stick to shopping online.

Why I’m petty: No, there’s no excuse for this one.

3. On a similar note, shoppers who leave all of their unwanted items and hangers on the floor

Why I’m peeved: Not only does this delay the fitting room line because the store associate has to go in and clean up after you, but it’s also just rude. I’m scared of you and what I assume your closet looks like.

Why I’m petty: Okay, so there’s no rule that says you have to clean up after yourself. Like, sure, it’s common decency, but I guess if you’re in a rush or something, things happen.

4. People who don’t use turn signals

Why I’m peeved: Listen, I’m not saying I’m the best driver in the world (at least, not out loud), but I really cannot believe the blind confidence and utter stupidity of some drivers! Dude, you literally lift one (1!)finger to use your turn signal… you really can’t do that?? How is it not muscle memory for you??

Why I’m petty: Maybe they don’t have enough fingers?? I’m running out of justifications for these peeves.

5. People with no spatial awareness

This applies to groups of people who take up the entire sidewalk and those lovely people who stop suddenly in the middle of a crowd.

Why I’m peeved: Just because you’re not in a rush doesn’t mean the people around you aren’t! There’s nothing wrong with a leisurely stroll in the city, but maybe stay to the side so people can get around you? Just a thought.

Why I’m petty: There are worse things than someone taking a stroll. Plus, we’ve probably all been this person/part of this group of people at least once in our lives.

6. Dog owners who leave their dog’s poop on the ground

Why I’m peeved: Dude, I just feel so bad for the dogs! Not to mention, it’s gross and rude to both the owner of the property and everyone who has to walk by and consequently avoid it. Your dog can’t clean up after itself, so you have to take responsibility!

Why I’m petty: Again, no excuse for this. Clean up after your pets! It’s not that hard!

7. People who LITTER.

Why I’m peeved: Where do these people get off thinking that they can just throw their shit on the ground?? I’m not saying everyone should be an environmentalist, but at least have respect for your surroundings.

Why I’m petty: I’m not. This is rude and dirty.

8. When guys leave the bathroom and then zip up their pants

Why I’m peeved: This tells me two things;

1. You didn’t wash your hands – gross! Please stay far away from me. You might not have even flushed the toilet if you’re in such a rush.

2. You lack basic respect for the people around you to the extent that you won’t even take two seconds to zip up your pants in the bathroom.

Why I’m petty: Maybe basic hygiene just isn’t that important to some people! At the end of the day, your body, your choice.

9. Buying clothes online (or in-store!!) that turn out to be see-through

Why I’m peeved: If I wanted a sheer, white tee, I would buy one. If I wanted to show my underwear through my pants, I would just omit pants. How dare you charge me so much for a strip of fabric that won’t even sufficiently cover my undergarments? Why would you purposely trick me into buying this article of clothing by presenting it as if it’s not see-through?

Why I’m petty: It’s really my own fault for trusting capitalist systems that exist solely to make money off of suckers like me. I should know better.

10. Improper grammar that boils my blood

– When people say “on accident” – it’s by accident.

– When people say “Should of” – You’re thinking of should’ve, which is short for should have. This also applies to would of and must of – it’s would have and must have.

Why I’m petty: Basically, this picture. I do feel bad about judging people based on their grammar, and I used to be so much worse about it. I just feel like some people shouldn’t disable auto-correct.

Okay, I’m done complaining now. Am I being too harsh? Unreasonable, even? What are your pet peeves? Let’s chat about it.

Thanks for reading!